Bluetooth Crazies

First of all, is this David Beckham in the picture I found when I searched "Bluetooth"?  I think it is. I'm about 92.8 % sure it's David Beckham.  He use to be the best at the world's favorite communist sport-soccer. 

Anyway, I've thought about this next topic A LOT.  When I was growing up, if someone was talking to their self in public, a couple of things would happen.  My mother would pull me closer to her side, and my father would watch that person with a weary eye.  Back then, we knew if somebody was talking to their self...something was wrong.  That person was a few bricks short of a load...Their elevator didn't go all the way to the top...They were a sandwich short of a picnic, if you will...A few clowns short of a circus...A few french fries short of a happy meal...They're not playing with a full deck...They're a couple goats short of a petting zoo...This could go on all day, but I won't allow it.  The point is, people who talk to their selves are crazies, weirdies, wack jobs, cranks, maniacs, lunatics, psychos, screwballs, crackpots, kooks, nuts, loony...ding-bats, ding-a-lings, freaks, bizzaros, etc.

The real point is that things aren't so cut and dry anymore because of Bluetooth technology.  When this phenomenon started, the headsets were so big, you KNEW that person was on the phone.  But now, their so small, you can't even see the things, especially if the person's head is turned a certain way.  So how do you know if you're in the midst of whack-o or a multi-tasker???  You definitely DO NOT want to stare.  Everyone knows if you stare at a crazy, things can get ugly.  You can't ask, obviously, unless you're a heartless prick.  So we have a problem.  What was once cut and dry is now kind of confusing.  You could try to befriend the person, but you might get more than you bargain for.  A crazy will follow you home, or try to sell you "scentless cologne" (aka tap water) or "invisible flowers" (aka nothing).  There's no easy way around this one.  If someone's talking to their self, they are either a padded room escapee or a tech-savvy business person. 

I guess, the message I've taken from this issue is that we're really not that different after all.  To be safe though, when in doubt, assume the person talking to their self wants to make a lamp shade out of your skin.  And then, walk away.  Quickly.